Friday, January 23, 2009
Did you know that not talking is a way of communicating something just as when you use words to express yourself? If you are unclear as to what your partner is trying to tell you, ask. There is still some information coming your way because research stresses that a large percent of what we communicate is done non verbally. For example, if you have tired to express a certain concern to your partner at some point and he or she rejected you, you may shy away from bring up that topic again for a while. Another person may react by becoming more forcefully and vocal. It all depends on your personality. Bottling up your feelings is not healthy since you may become resentful or disappointed and as a result, blame your partner for the way you feel. Remember that you have to claim what you feel because only you can choose your feelings and how to express them. When you are in a conflict with another person, it is often the result of two things: one, you believe that the other person is trying to change you, and two, you are trying to change the other person either consciously or unconsciously. The reason behind this is your belief that you will become more content, happy, satisfied and less stressed in your relationship. It is natural to want to decrease the unpleasant experiences in your life. What you may not realize however, is that conflict arises when the other person’s autonomy is not respected. Arguments, fighting, and miscommunication occur when you partner feels that his or her self and point of view are being disregarded. During an argument, you may feel that you are right and the other person wrong. If both of you agree on something...(Liked what you've just read? Consider getting the book or making a donation)
Excerpt from : Couple's Communication Made Easy (audio book)
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
How can we find peace in a tough economy? Jobs end, relationships dissolve, money come and go and homes change. It is healthy and at time necessary to remember that change is growth. Growth is an ever present and ever changing phenomenon that can occur only with changes. Spiritual growth means acknowledging the flexibility within and accepting the impermanence of things. Change is the perpetual force in life. It is an energy that is constantly in motion. We need to view life as a continuous string of events without a beginning or end. Perceiving life in as constantly changing shows us that we attribute qualities and time frames such as past, present and future to our existence. The economy is only one of the things that goes under methamorposis like anything else in life. Being mindful and thankful for the things that we have despite external struggles is something that can make us stronger, peaceful and spiritually abundant. Do you remember to be thankful for your family, your health, your ability to work and willingness to seek employment? Do you remember to smile at the small things in life like a hug, a hot cup of cocoa, a soft pillow and a warm meal?
Attaining spiritual peace is a process of continuous growth within change.
Only change is consistent in life. Existence in itself is something we struggle to explain or comprehend. Each individual therefore experiences spiritual growth or inner development subjectively. It should not be surprising that different people report similar experiences during an enlightening experience. Everything in nature is connected and one person can tap into the same information as another one. However, how each person experiences this situation and then tries to explain it to others occurs on a totally personal and subjective level.
Change is an inevitable part of our existence. Everything is in a constant flux of change. No matter how much we try to change things, change usually occurs at its own time. With this in mind, how does one keep oneself peaceful, healthy and complete? Sometimes changes brings favorable outcomes and at others, destruction and despair. When we are happy and undisturbed mentally, we rarely seek other's help or question our part in this changing life. It is not an easy task for a person to go through the notions of life without ever being affected by pain. This is especially evident during the down times when we sink into depression, hopelessness, anxiety, or discontent.
How can we keep a mentally healthy and spiritually abundant lifestyle when we are like a leaf carried by the wind or like a tiny boat in the ocean blown away in the ocean? Our mental states are dictated by changes of which we are not always fully aware. As!long as we attribute our struggles, depression, unhappiness and hopelessness to something out of our control, we will suffer. Change is not our enemy in life. Change represents life itself. If we go against our own nature, how are we to ever achieve balance and freedom? Or unhappiness comes from the fact that we go through life halfway conscious. We move from one situation into another carrying different moods and expectations. We realize that desire brings impatience, anger brings hatred and that until we break off from this pattern, we will continue to be caught up in vicious a cycle. Once we realize that we alone can trap our self in a well filled with pain, we can make a conscious decision to escape from it by using what is inside of us. Often times we're caught up in life having to meet deadlines, provide for our family and keep a socially acceptable persona while we miss the opportunity to face our most inner needs. In an age when everything is fast paced, we become accustomed to the flow of external events which in return molds our personality to fit different situations. As time goes by, we lose objectivity and become marionettes of the necessity to please and perform in order to meet societal demands. There will be no outer change in our life without an inner transformation. A person needs to mindfully transition from one state into another weather that is on a mental, emotional or a spiritual level. Many of us are not attentive to our inner state of being and its true spiritual desires. We may acknowledge that we get sad, angry, happy, and aroused but rarely do we acknowledge that even though things around us and even our thoughts and feelings are transitional. Once we realize this, we can have a greater control of our spiritual self and find inner peace. It is our ego that goes through life's changes. This easily afflicted self is our personal character filled with fear, doubt, depression and anxiety which endures a never-ending struggle. In spite of all of the difficulties life presents us with there is possibility for a healthier and peaceful life style and equilibrium that can be reached in the present moment.
Excerpt from : Guru in Jeans: Inward Journey to Psychospiritual Awakening
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Adult acne is caused by an oily substance produced by the skin’s sebaceous glands. This sebum clogs pores and thus attracts bacteria. As a result the skin becomes inflamed. In some adults, facial breakouts occur as a result of the presence of male hormones - such as testastrone. Female hormones such as estrogen can also triger acne.
Step2 Some ways to treat adult acne are:
Using gentle facial cleansers. Try to get Cetaphil and Aquanil but any other mild ones will do. Avoid those that have granulated beads as they may even further irritate the skin especially if you have sensitive skin. Good cleansers have salycilic acid, tea trea oil and are non comogenic leaving the sking feeling clean and soft but not overly dry.
Step3 Use lotions that contain bezo peroxide and salycilic acid. You will have to use them on a consisten basis as their effect wears off when you halt using them. Benzo peroxide kills bacteria while the salicylic acid dries the inflicted area.
Sulfur masks and clay masks are also great (although it is not know how exactly sulfur works)
Step4 You may decide to consult a dermatologist for prescribed medications and lotions such as Clindamycin lotion (has antimicrobial properties), Retin A (although initially this prescribed lotion opens your pores which in the first few days may cause more break out) Benza Clean cream or resort to using oral antibiotics.
You may also use a blue spectrum light like Glo Lite that kills facial bacteria. Visit the crankychicks store for products.
1. Jewelry at overstock.com shipping is $2.95 (also you can use the bill me later option and won't have to pay for 90 days)
2. Frederick's of Hollywood has many items on sale (cheaper than Victoria's Secret and even sexier)
3. Venus has wonderful deals on sexy outfits and accessories
4. Let's not forget the option for a gift for the two of you from Adam & Eve
5. For the Chocoholic of course chocolate from Dan's Chocolates
6. Palm Beach Jewelry has affordable gifts (and even a 3 months 0% payment plan option) on jewelry, perfumes/colognes and accessories many of which you can personalize.
7. Don't want to spend on a fancy dinner? Get a bag of Bertolie pasta, a nice red wine, candles, put on some nice music and voila
8. Bake a heart shaped cake (everything you need you will find at your local grocery)
9. Give each other a massage with massage oils or lotion
10. If you're are getting flowers consider a local flower shop versus delivery from country wide vendors (you will save money on shipping/handling ) and the flowers arrive fresh. You may also get flowers at your local grocery store. Many wonderful flower arrangements and beautiful roses can be found there for a cheaper price.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Children are quite aware when one, or sadly both parents, are disengaged from their lives. Sometimes a child will resent following the directions given by the reactive parent and may say things like:
“Why should I listen to you? You never listen to me!”
“I don’t want to clean up my room now because you did not look at my school report card, and I have gotten all As.”
At other times, the child may act out covertly but still send out the same message. He may ignore the parent’s directives as a way of showing the parent how it feels to be ignored. Younger children lack the proper verbal skills to express how they feel and will usually act out the way they feel.
A sensible parent will be able to pick up on the child’s verbal and non-verbal cues and will address the situation. A reactive parent will continue to discipline the child as in the past and expect different results, but unfortunately, like in any relationship, parenting reciprocity is an essential component.
The reactive parent usually leaves it to the other parent to make all of the decisions and to discipline the child while the other parent’s style of disciplining has a “hands-off” component. This parent is disengaged from parenting the child altogether and usually reacts only to the child’s misbehavior. In such a case, the child may learn to rely solely on the sensible parent and/or manipulate the reactive parent when the other parent is not around.
Try to have some regular quality time with your child as a family. When a child sees you as being engaged with him, he will be more willing to follow your directives and you will not be seen as just another adult trying to tell him what to do or not to do. Just buying your daughter the latest model Barbie, for instance, won’t make... (like what you've just read? Consider ordering the audio book or making a donation)
Excerpt from: My Kid is Acting Out and I am about to shout: Effective Parenting Made Easy (audio book)
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Friday, January 2, 2009
If you are not invested in your partner on an emotional level, you are not making love. To make love is to be connected on these two levels – emotional and physical. Sometimes couples do not even realize that this is causing a problem in their relationship. You probably just know intuitively that something does not feel right. A true partnership functions as a union. This means that when you partner is depressed, stressed out and discontent with something in his or her life that you find the time to attend to his or her needs. You do not just go to bed, have sex and fall asleep and then wake up and go on with your day in the morning. When your partner’s experiences become your own concern, you will know what a true partnership is. Only then, you will find true intimacy and a fulfilling relationship. Find some time to help with chores around the house. Try not to read your newspaper or watch TV during dinner and do not answer phone calls during those times when the two of you are spending quality time. Find time to compliment each other. Do not neglect your appearance just because you’ve already found someone to be with. Take risks and try new things together. (Liked what you've just read? Consider getting the book or making a donation)
Excerpt from : Couple's Communication Made Easy (audio book)